I am in love with one of my best friend . At least I think I am in love with her. When I first met her, I really didn’t like her. She was jus another random girl. But then we got to know each other better and she sort of grew on me, and she was so special to me I started liking everything about her even the stuff that I hated I started liking them. We share the same interests and goals. Not very long after I started to get to know her, I started to think about her romantically. Soon after, we became best friends, always together. And my feelings have done nothing but grown since then. My tongue slips when I’m talking to her, can’t lie neither can’t deny to her. My friends have been urging me to tell her how I feel about her, but I didn’t want her to feel awkward and ruin the friendship we have. I tried to give her hints about my true feelings, but it didn’t work so well. It took me many months to work up the courage to tell her about the feelings I had for her. When I finally tried, she told me that we had too good of a friendship, that she didn’t want to ruin it, that I was like a good friend to her and that she couldn’t feel that way for me and she always saw me as a friend nothing more. My world slipped, I just can’t shake this feeling. Several times the pain I feel has grown so strong that I needed to take a ‘vacation’ from her, which just gave my mind time to fantasize about how great she is and how someday she has to give me a shot. I tried to stay away from hr ignore her. avoid things that is relates to her, But when I am away from her for so long, I miss her to the point where the only thing I want to do is be with her. I always thought of her, the moments we spend together. No matter how much it hurts to know she doesn’t feel the same way. I have actually cried about this more then hundred times. Every time when I think about she is not going to be mine it makes me cry. The only advice I have gotten so far is to ‘get over it’, and if I could, I would. But I can’t. I think that the reason I can’t get over this is because I can’t let go of the hopes that some day, she may change her mind. And I truly believe that if she did feel the same, I would marry her in a heartbeat. And there I go again with the ‘ifs’. I tried to see her as a friend. I tried to avoid my love for her and just be friend with her, but I failed it’s just a feeling that I can’t control. Every time I am around her I act different. I don’t know why but something happens to me. She is just different and I don’t see any other girl like her. The times she and I were together alone were magical. Her relationship with me as a friend was juts meaningful as if she were an actual girlfriend. I dreamt to marry her and live rest of my life with her, but I guess my dreams will remain as ONLY “DREAMS” but after all I still love her and still hope that there will be a day when she will change her mind and feel the same way as me. I don’t know why am I afraid of loosing her when she is not even mine. I thought I would forget her, but I guess I forgot to. Being friends with her wasn’t that special because that’s all we could be. I hope someday she realizes that I was the one for her and comes back to me. I would gladly accept her and marry her and love her to death. Who knows where life takes us. I guess time will tell.